7. Parkinson’s: not just for old people anymore

It was my routine to join my parents for a cocktail in the evening, and, on that day, sitting in their living room, sipping a martini, I disclosed the doctor’s findings. “I have Parkinson’s Disease,” I reported. The words felt foreign as I spoke them aloud in reference to me, for the first time. Then, my best friend called from Nashville, as she was also anxious to hear what I had learned at my doctor’s appointment. “I have Parkinson’s Disease,” I repeated, still uncomfortable with the words.

“No” was all any of them could think to say. And “yes” was all I had to offer. I guess I was so relieved not to have ALS, and maybe I was still numbed by the news. More likely, it just didn’t seem real to any of us. Old people had Parkinson’s. I was only 49. “How could they be sure?” they asked. And “What now?” was the next question. But I had no answers for them.

On the way home from the doctor that day, I had heard, for the first time, a brand new song by Tim McGraw. The words had gripped me immediately and I had pulled off the road to listen closely to the lyrics…

He said I was in my early 40’s,
With a lot of life before me,
And a moment came that stopped me on a dime.
I spent most of the next days, lookin’ at the x-rays,
Talkin’ ’bout the options and talkin’ ’bout sweet time.
Asked him when it sank in, that this might really be the real end.
How’s it hit ya, when you get that kind of news.
Man what ya do.
And he says,

[Chorus]

I went sky divin’,
I went rocky mountain climbin’,
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull name Fumanchu.
And I loved deeper,
And I spoke sweeter,
And I gave forgiveness I’ve been denying,
And he said someday I hope you get the chance,
To live like you were dyin’

I had no answers for my parents or my friend that evening, but Tim McGraw’s song had definitely offered me some wise advice that afternoon. I had just gotten that kind of news and – though skydiving, rock climbing, and bull riding are not on my personal list of “things to do before I die” – it was time to take stock of what is on that list! I reminded myself: I was still “young” …and I had plenty of living yet to do! We’re all dying, after all. (Not one of us is getting out of this world alive!)